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Survivor: Colombia
Contestants Jobowo: Brick - The Cadet Tom TDWI - The Dork Vaporeon - The Water Warrior Arthur - The Morbidly Obeeeese One Brendon Urie - The Eccentric Singer Kole - The Food Lover Stephen - The Creepy Teacher Marty - The Guy who undergoes plastic surgery to look like Miranda Cosgrove, and own a ice cream store where we really puts human body parts of his past lovers in Tamiqua: Violet - The Lifeguard Dawn - The Moonchild Jade - The Deadpan Snarker Eleanor - The Tumblr Hipster Simone - The Misandrist Staci - The Compulsive Liar Monica Culpepper - Former-NFL Wife with Giant Plastic Casabas Penny - The Cutthroat Competitor Chapter 1: "Are you sure you guys shouldn't be on Tamiqua?" Day 1 The 16 competitors arrive and are separated into tribes based on sex. This instantly pleases Simone, who has a freakish hatred of men. Upon hearing her status as a feminist, Staci launches into a speech about how her great-great-great-great-grandmother led the civil rights movement, annoying the entire tribe. Meanwhile, at Jobowo, Brick and Tom TDWI are occupied discussing fashion school and the music of Hustin Heever, but are interrupted by a rude Vaporeon. “With all this fangirl talk, are you guys sure you shouldn’t be on Tamiqua?” He deadpans. “We could switch you guys out for that fat chick and the aura freak.” Brick, having had played with Dawn and Staci previously, instantly defends them and himself and Tom. He and Vaporeon then get into a bit of an argument before the meek and submissive Brick steps down. Brendon Urie then tries to lighten the mood by saying that if anyone should be sent to the women’s tribe for being gay, it should be him. As night falls, Kole and Arthur start to get hungry and are brought food by Stephen. Although they are grateful, they are creeped out by Stephen, who then insists that he’s not a predator. Day 2 The first challenge has the tribes divide into four groups of two for each segment of the challenge. First, one pair will dig up a bag of puzzle pieces from the beach. The second pair will race the bag over to the third pair, who will open it and assemble the puzzle. The fourth pair will then take the puzzle and run it over to Jeff Probst. First team to finish the course wins. First leg: Stephen & Marty (Jobowo), Dawn & Monica (Tamiqua) Second leg: Brick & Tom (Jobowo), Jade & Violet (Tamiqua) Third leg: Kole & Arthur (Jobowo), Staci & Eleanor (Tamiqua) Fourth leg: Brendon & Vaporeon (Jobowo), Penny & Simone (Tamiqua) The teams compete in the race. Tamiqua gains an early lead because of Dawn’s ability to communicate with crabs, and further said lead when Violet is able to run quickly over to Staci and Eleanor. However, Staci’s constant babble makes it harder for she and Eleanor to finish the puzzle quickly, and they fall behind when Kole and Arthur finish first. After they finally do finish, it’s race to the finish line. Jobowo is at a huge disadvantage because of Vaporeon’s incompetence on land. Unfortunately, he eventually stumbles and drops the puzzle, causing it to break. This, combined with Simone’s extreme desire to defeat a tribe of men on national TV, cause Tamiqua to win the challenge and immunity. In addition, they receive a reward of a large feast with their favorite foods from home. Day 3 Tamiqua rise early to enjoy their feast. Monica begins to worry about what’d happen if the tribe goes to Tribal Council, much to the annoyance of Penny. When Monica mentions her husband, Staci begins a speech about how her boyfriend is also in the NFL. This sparks a sardonic remark from Jade, who is backed up by Eleanor. Dawn voices her disapproval of the mean-spirited nature of the tribe, and Violet quickly agrees. The two and Eleanor and Jade then get into an argument, ruining the feast for the entire tribe. Meanwhile, Jobowo prepares for Tribal Council. Vaporeon is blasted by Brick and Tom for his comments on Day 1, and struggles to deflect any votes towards the unlikable Stephen and Marty. Stephen responds by reassuring the tribe that he’s not at all creepy in real life, and that they shouldn’t judge a book by its cover. He calls Marty out for remarks he allegedly made at the last challenge, stating that he’s a skilled digger because he’s used to digging ditches and criticizes him for looking like Miranda Cosgrove. When the tribe reaches Tribal Council, Kole and Arthur defend Stephen for being generous and bringing them food, as they need it due to being “morbidly obeeeeese.” While it’s unclear who is going home, Marty ends up with his torch snuffed after the vote comes out 5-2-1, with Vaporeon receiving two votes and Stephen getting the last one.